Saturday, January 10, 2009
Peace Passing
In honor of all my English friends.
I'm from the South, and southern folks are huggers. If ever we meet in person and you'd rather not have a hug, simply hold your hands in front of your body at chest height, palms facing outward, and I will get the message. Is that fair enough?
Thanks to Ann.
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Oh, Mimi, what a scream! I chuckled, roared, and guffawed. This is the C of E!
ReplyDeleteI am a California native and you already know how huggy I am.
Oh dear. I had to learn to embrace my sister when we started going to the same church. Otherwise I only embrace at funerals. Our family never made outward displays of affection. I think we are real C of E :-)
ReplyDeleteI learned to hug in Latin America...I mean, before I was very shy about hugging men (especially if it meant they may know what I may have been thinking)...as it turns out, I love hugging and I get hugged/abrazos all the time and sometimes very loving and extended hugs (complete with double back patting)...whew, what a relief, my Dad was English, we hugged but not Latinlike...of course, Latins are very warm and are good at being warm...wonderful instructors.
ReplyDeleteDEFROST!
HUGGING IS GOOD!
What do you think of my sign language?
ReplyDeleteWe are not too huggy in my family -- guess I will have to spend more time in the southern americas and have some tutorials. My father and family came from Norway - I think they lived in very small houses and there was so much closeness that hugging was just too much.
ReplyDeleteMy husband's technique for avoiding hugs at church is to keep one harm across his body as tho preparing for a karate chop and holding out the other to receive a handshake!! LOL
I enjoyed the post. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteGosh, I think the combination of being a native New Englander and having spent the past 18 years in Japan, has made me pretty stand-offish at church. One priest started having us hold hands during the 'Our Father'. That was the end of Thursday morning mass for me- the church ladies hunted down the misanthropes:)
simply hold your hands in front of your body at chest height, palms facing outward, and I will get the message.
ReplyDeleteMay I suggest a variation?
Instead of palms outward, put them together,and bow slightly.
Namaste.
I am a modified non hugger. I hug only when it's a case of "I know something bad has happened, and I have no idea of what to say, but I very much want to be here for you."
Or if I've been hugged and am simply hugging back.
Which happens a lot, since I work with several ladies from Latin America.
Grandmere --I love to hug! And this set me laughing my head off! Dang, why have a body if you can't be touched--especially in church!
ReplyDeleteI'm with kishnevi - I'll hug at times.
ReplyDeleteI'll shake hands for social occasions, but don't like it much in church. The worst is at RC Masses where they hold hands.
I hate being forced to hold hands - at one church those gathered around the altar all hold hands during the Lord's Prayer --- it feels invasive to me.
ReplyDeleteIt's not just southern - my family is eastern European only two generations back - we hugged and kissed. Very English Protestant neighbors moved in next door - I'll never forget the look on Martha's face he first time my dad gave her a big hug! But by the time we moved away - she thanked us for teaching her how to hug.
ReplyDeleteI don´t like handholding either...especially at prayer...it feels forced to me and a bit showy...in Latin America people sometimes, if forced, will nod without eye contact, to someone they WON´T HUG at a social function! There are many unhugables here but generally Latins are a forgiving lot (amnesia?)...much genuine warmth, which I think sometimes means hope for better days/daze.
ReplyDeleteI am a big hugger and hand holder but I respect that other feel otherwise.
ReplyDeleteSo if you meet me in person, please feel free to just push me away.
Or hug me!
This was hilarious! Peace be with you - this is the C of E, or the RCC!
True confession: Some southerners are not huggers. Grandpère will not push you away. He simply grits his teeth and bears it.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely hilarious!
ReplyDeletePart of the family forbears are southern huggers; some are non-touching Dutch patroons from NY or NE Puritans.
So as a result, whenever the family gathers some hug, some straight arm you, a few cross their arms; and the cousins who've married out of the gene pool into the Greek Isles, Latin America, etc. grab you and plant a kiss.
Reunions are a hoot. I long ago decided to shed the icy reserve and join forces with the more hot blooded cousins.
Life's too short, hug, kiss and be joyful.
The great majority of gay men whom I have met in this country are great huggers and kissers, even on the first meeting, sometimes kissing on both cheeks in the French manner.
ReplyDeleteI have to give Dr. Bob twenty minutes notice of my intention to hug him at the peace.
ReplyDeleteWe all do it now as an act of rebellion. He's a shadow of his former self.
DP, hugging as an act of rebellion? I love it! Humiliation by hugging.
ReplyDeleteYes but we all humiliate Dr. Bob. He has a big brain and it keeps him humble what with him being generally infallible.
ReplyDeleteNew years Eve, last year, I was in Belgium and was greeted with an accolade (French custom) by the young son of the Portugese maid.
ReplyDeleteI was so charmed - and a little sentimental because it reminded me of my dear Grandfather... who was the only one to do that back home (maybe because of his Wallon heritage?)