TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America ..
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
____________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this kid)
____________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
__________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_______________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie...... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
______________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's... Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
___________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
__________________________________
Remember: LAUGHTER IS THE SOUL'S MEDICINE!!
It is, Doug, it is. Thanks.
True story, Mimi.
ReplyDeleteMy cousin's 7 year old little boy came home from school and said to me, "Did you know my anus is a planet?"
"What?"
"My anus is a planet."
"No, honey, URANUS is a planet."
"That's what I said, my anus is a planet!"
Kirke, hilarious! If I didn't know you to be a person of absolute integrity, I would not believe this story.
ReplyDeleteI really like H to O, but then I would.
ReplyDeleteYes, MotherScientist.
ReplyDeleteVery funny!
ReplyDeleteThis is the kind of post in which I would use dog toys and knick-knacks.
ReplyDeletePadre, of course! But then, you're much more creative than I am. Your Friday mini-dramas are only one example of your brilliance.
ReplyDeleteThanks for these Grandmere. As you know I love silly jokes and the like but haven't had many on my blog of late. Hope you don't mind me putting a link to these.
ReplyDeletePetty, I don't mind at all. Go ahead and copy the whole joke. It's not mine.
ReplyDeleteHonest and for true, Mimi...and I'm saving the story until years from now to spring on the person he plans to marry. It's a tradition in my family to spring those sorts of tales on the betrothed, and embarrass the living crap out of the relative.
ReplyDeleteKirke, what a splendid family tradition! I love it.
ReplyDelete