Wednesday, March 2, 2011

MORE PUN FUN

When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.

The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

The batteries were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a dead giveaway.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.

You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.

A boiled egg is hard to beat.

Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

In a democracy, it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

Acupuncture: a jab well done.


Don't blame me. Blame susan s.

Oh my goodness! Paul (A.) sent me the same list some time ago, and it got lost in my flood of email. Then, too, I was more concerned about Paul (A.)'s injuries from slipping on the ice than about posting his list of puns. Neverthess, mea culpa! He sent them first.

12 comments:

  1. There is a saying in parts of NE England, Mimi, that "a joke's a joke, but bugger a carnival."

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  2. Lapin, I confess I'm not sure I get your NE England saying, but I fear asking for an explanation. "Too many puns" is all that comes to mind.

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  3. It's to do with letting things get out of hand or over the edge, Mimi.

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  4. I knew I shouldn't have asked, Lapin.

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  5. Well, you can blame me, but I didn't say she had to put them all up at once. . .

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  6. susan, as I see it, you're pretty well exonerated of all blame.

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  7. Is that sort of like Pope Benny exonerating the Jews?

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  8. Exactly, susan. Do you feel better now that you're exonerated? I'm sure the Jews are thrilled.

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  9. To my amusement, this same list was shared in a moment of humor at our staff meeting today.

    There is hope for the world when we do not take ourselves too seriously.

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  10. Paul, how nice that you have humor breaks at your workplace. If every place of work instituted humor breaks, I'm sure productivity would increase.

    About the Jews, according to one article I read, at least some Jews are thrilled, so my snark stands corrected.

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  11. I thought that it was unnecessary for them to have been exonerated twice. I was under the impression that that had happened during the reign of an earlier pope. In any case, I guess that the fact that this pope is German rather than Polish makes it a more important occasion.

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