Father Jake reflects on his recent quiet day for clergy in this post. In it, he speaks of the search for intimacy with God, and says:
When we talk about this longing for intimacy, it is essential that we include the shadow side of this longing. Intimacy includes ambivalence, fear, resistance and avoidance. If we become vulnerable enough to allow another to love us, and for us to return that love, we may get hurt. We may be rejected. We're not sure we can deal with that, especially if the one spurning us is the living God.
....
The point being that even for clergy, it is sometimes a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. And, if we are not careful, it is so easy to slip into the habit of avoiding God. We're much too busy running a non-profit organization, right?
In the comments, I said this:
IMHO, it is always a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. On the other hand, we must not lose hold of the truth that the living God loves us infinitely, without reservation, no matter what.
From the daily office today is this passage from Amos:
The Day of the Lord a Dark Day
Alas for you who desire the day of the Lord!
Why do you want the day of the Lord?
It is darkness, not light;
as if someone fled from a lion,
and was met by a bear;
or went into the house and rested a hand against the wall,
and was bitten by a snake.
Is not the day of the Lord darkness, not light,
and gloom with no brightness in it?
I hate, I despise your festivals,
and I take no delight in your solemn assemblies.
Even though you offer me your burnt-offerings and grain-offerings,
I will not accept them;
and the offerings of well-being of your fatted animals
I will not look upon.
Take away from me the noise of your songs;
I will not listen to the melody of your harps.
But let justice roll down like waters,
and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream.
Amos 5:18-24
Christianity is not for the faint-hearted. The way laid out by the prophets and in the Gospel is not a smooth and easy road. Jesus' way goes against nearly everything that our culture pushes us toward. We walk against the wind the greater part of the time. Indeed, it's the way of the cross. The babe who's appearance we await was born to take the way of the cross. If we have any concept of this idea, then Advent is, indeed, a dark time.
But, thanks be to God, the babe incarnate broke through and came into the world to be one of us, to save us, to light the way to the Kingdom of God, the Kingdom which is right now, but not yet, the Kingdom in which "justice roll[s] down like waters and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream".
I don't know about you, but I need salvation every single day of my life, simply for my survival.
Now to him who is able to keep you from falling, and to make you stand without blemish in the presence of his glory with rejoicing, to the only God our Saviour, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, power, and authority, before all time and now and for ever. Amen.
Jude 24-25
The point being that even for clergy, it is sometimes a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. And, if we are not careful, it is so easy to slip into the habit of avoiding God. We're much too busy running a non-profit organization, right?
ReplyDeleteHow those words make me shudder, Grandmere - because they are so true. I have just come out of two lengthy meetings, parish-centred, involving good Christian folk talking about money, the paying of money and the raising of money. We adjourned feeling that we had done the right thing for the Church, of course...
Rural Rector, what can I say? I left my one term on the vestry of my church with great relief. I contributed very little in my three years. I already knew that would be the case, before I served, but I felt I should take a turn.
ReplyDeleteI know that important work is done by those who serve on vestries, and I don't mean to diminish their contribution to the life of the church, but I was not at all suited for it.
I suspect that not a few priests are not suited for meetings, but unfortunately the priest has no option to walk away, as I did at the end of my term.
My low point was the strategic planning Saturdays, in which we were hit with an immense amount of detail from an adaptation of a business model as a model for church planning. My head was swimming. I couldn't say a word through the whole morning, because I couldn't take in the vast amount of information. It did not help that an adapted business model for church planning did not seem like a good idea to me.
And yet, since our rector has been with us - two years or so - our membership has grown, and we are in a less precarious financial position. So, what do I know?
He's a good man, very pastoral, very attentive to those among us most in need. He pushes us to expand our notions of inclusivity and to be open and aware of those outside our circle who have needs. Perhaps, that's the reason for the growth. I'd like to think that it is.
RR, I didn't mean to run on this long, but here it is.
Oh Grandmere this is so moving. It makes me think of my pastor and I think I will share it with him.
ReplyDeleteReally lovely.
I don't know about you, but I need salvation every single day of my life, simply for my survival.
ReplyDeleteMe too, Grandmère. Preach it, Sister Granny Woman! (Was that too disrespectrul? You are younger than my sisters, so perhaps that makes me overbold.)
The conclusion of Jude, unlike the rather dire rest of the letter, is simply glorious, giving fresh hope. After all, it is God who brings to completion the saving work begun in us, who guarantees the results; and that is a comfort (especially, though not exclusively by any means, for clergy who know they have bitten off more than they, humanly, can chew).
Fran, thank you, love. What will your priest make of it?
ReplyDeletePreach it, Sister Granny Woman!
Paul, not disrespectful at all. I love it. It is in such contrast to my Mediterranean-style Roman Catholic upbringing.
Yes, I can pick and choose my Bible verses to suit my own purposes, too, like others that I know.
In the last few years in our church we've moved from purple to blue during Advent. I understand the desire to differentiate between Advent and Lent, but I must admit I miss the emphasis on Advent also as a season of penitence, not just hope. I know I need to repent every day of my life.
ReplyDeleteOnce again, a very thought-provoking post. The Daily Office readings at this time of year are bracing, aren't they?
Tim bracing is exactly the proper word for the Advent readings. I must say that they are my favorites of the church year. A balance between repentance and hope is what they seem to offer.
ReplyDeleteOur priest has changed to the blue, too. A former rector used them, but he'd say that they were purple. Perhaps, he was color-blind. They are not purple.
G'mere -- A friend of mine in college used to be seriously annoyed at those who answered the phone at this time of year with a chipper "Merry Christmas" -- In response to this untoward and mistimed jollity, he answered the phone with "Penitent Advent"
ReplyDeleteSusan, excellent idea from your college friend. I'll have to try that one to see what response I get.
ReplyDelete