Thursday, January 1, 2009

Shocking Act Of Thievery

Oyster, the Intrepid, at Your Right Hand Thief, fills us in (with a little help from Salon) on a shocking act of thievery:

Tragically, the Holy Prepuce was stolen in 1983. Thus, for the past quarter century we've celebrated the Feast of the Circumcision with a nagging uncertainty and shame. Why did our generation have to lose (part of) the body of Christ? (It was in a shoebox in a priest's closet for goodness sakes-- how much more secure can you get?)

Read the rest for the full details. Who else but a thief would have the skinny on thievery?

16 comments:

  1. Did you know that Catherine of Siena had a vision that when she married Christ (as a nun) he used his foreskin as a wedding ring.

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  2. Oh, not to worry. There was a theory that when OLJC ascended into Heaven, the Holy Prepuce ascended with him. And if that's not the case, there were several places in Europe that claimed to have the actual Holy Prepuce (which raises a couple of interesting issues), so there's bound to be another one somewhere.

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  3. Ann, I did not know that, and it was something that I really needed to know.

    BillyD, are you sure?

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  4. Did you know that Catherine of Siena had a vision that when she married Christ (as a nun) he used his foreskin as a wedding ring.

    Something old? Something new? Something borrowed? Something blue?

    Inquiring minds want to know!

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  5. Heck, Rmj, it was "Something Old" when OLJC ascended!

    It's said that Buddha (or was it Confucius?) once fell asleep while meditating, and in his anger, tore off his eyelids . . . which promptly sprouted, and turned into tea plants (w/ the wakey-wakey caffeine, Ta-da!)

    One wonder if something similarly . . . um, virile became of the Holy Prepuce. ;-/

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  6. It's said that Buddha (or was it Confucius?) once fell asleep while meditating, and in his anger, tore off his eyelids . . . which promptly sprouted, and turned into tea plants (w/ the wakey-wakey caffeine, Ta-da!)

    It was Bodhidharma, who was also supposed to have sat so long and unmoving in meditation that his arms and legs fell off, hence Daruma dolls!

    As to what happened to the Holy Prepuce, ask the mohel: good service deserves a tip.

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  7. BillyD, are you sure?

    Always, and about everything. I really must work on this in the coming year... :-)

    In this case, though, I'm not only sure - I'm also correct.

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  8. Brings out the comedian in us all, doesn't it?

    As to what happened to the Holy Prepuce, ask the mohel: good service deserves a tip.

    Excellent, Mark.

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  9. "Did you know that Catherine of Siena had a vision that when she married Christ (as a nun) he used his foreskin as a wedding ring." Shame Bernini didn't carve his impression of that event for posterity.

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  10. And two rather unsavory questions popped into my head, but they beg to be answered:

    What does a prepuce reliquary look like?

    What does one normally do with the foreskin after a bris?

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  11. What does one normally do with the foreskin after a bris?

    The mohel puts it aside with other foreskins, until he has enough to make a wallet. These wallets are very much sought after, as when they are rubbed they turn into briefcases.

    Not really. The actual custom is to bury it, often near a young tree.

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  12. Re Lapin's comment, see this sculpture by Bernini, "The Ecstasy of St Teresa".

    Wilfried, according to Wiki:

    The Holy Prepuce of Calcata is worthy of special mention, as the reliquary containing the Holy Foreskin was paraded through the streets of this Italian village as recently as 1983 on the Feast of the Circumcision, which was formerly marked by the Roman Catholic Church around the world on January 1 each year.

    I could not find a picture of a prepuce reliquary. Google is your friend, should you want to look further.

    BillyD, thanks for your information.

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  13. I too failed to locate a pic of the prepuce reliquary. However, Googling did lead me to the following:

    Wiki also describes the prepuce reliquary as "jewel-encrusted," contrary to the Slate article's "shoebox."

    I also found mention of relics of our Lord's umbilicus, baby teeth, and bloody, also belying Slate's claim that the prepuce is "the only piece of his body he supposedly left on earth."

    You can find a photo of the umbilicus reliquary here; dig the giant crystal on his bellybutton:

    http://tinyurl.com/8edoba

    Finally, some totally random, totally morbid circumcision trivia:

    http://tinyurl.com/9fu5lx

    You told me to Google, I hold you wholy responsible for this post.

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  14. Wilfried, thank you.

    The things some people will think, and do, and make are amazing. All you would ever want to know and more about this, and that, and the other thing.

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  15. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_gw_0_6?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=an+irreverent+curiosity&sprefix=an+irr

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