Many of us over 50, WAY over 50, or on the way to 50 are quite confused about how we should present ourselves.
We're unsure about the kind of image we are projecting and whether or not we are correct as we try to conform to current fashion.
In spite of what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together and should be avoided:
1. A nose ring and bifocals
2.. Spiked hair and bald spots
3. A pierced tongue and dentures
4. Miniskirts and support hose
5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads
6. Speedo's and cellulite
7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar
8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor
9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge
10. Pierced nipples that hang below the waist
11. Bikinis and liver spots.
12. Short shorts and varicose veins.
13. Inline skates and a walker..
And the ultimate 'Bad Taste' in fashion for the older folks....
14. Thongs and Depends.
Please keep these basic guidelines foremost in your mind when
you shop.
Don't blame me. Blame Ann and Doug, who sent slightly different versions.
Posted without the picture that Doug sent along. Sorry, Doug, I couldn't take it, and my readers should thank me for not inflicting it on them.
The thing is, when some of the pierced and tattooed crowd grow old, some of this is really going to happen (not the last item, one hopes ;-)) - I keep thinking about this when I see tattoos on upper arms...
ReplyDeleteI imagine that some of this already with us. I know some old hippies who are there now. I like the inline skates and a walker myself. That might make the skating doable.
ReplyDeleteI once knew an old sailor who got a tattoo of Betty Grable on his arm when he was 18. That tattoo lasted longer than Betty Grable did.
ReplyDeleteI suspect the same will be true of every generation of hipster that goes to bed in evening up to the minute, and wakes up the next morning to find themselves old fashioned.
My tattoo is on my ankle. Ankles don't have very far to sag.
ReplyDeleteAmelia, I wouldn't think of skating with out my walker.
Thongs and Depends,.... You've just described the local beaches...lol!!
ReplyDeleteThere are occasional moments when I was not blessed with a visual imagination. Reading this was one of those moments.
ReplyDeleteAfter my misadventure at OCICBOV with my post picturing the less-than-buff men in their Speedos, I think the garments should be banned.
ReplyDeleteNo mention of tattoos and varicose veins, then. That would have been top of my list.
ReplyDeleteMadPriest, thanks for nothing. I forgot to show you my tattoo while I was in England, didn't I? You could have seen for yourself. If you squint your eyes a little, the veins don't show that much.
ReplyDeleteAh well. C'est la vie. (That means "such is life").
ReplyDeleteTu as plein de merde, mon cher Père le Fou. (No translation.)
ReplyDelete... and I don't need one.
ReplyDeleteBon!
ReplyDeleteHow sweet to see both y'all still getting along so well, even after the meeting.
ReplyDeleteHi Johnieb! It's good to hear from you again. How ya doin'?
ReplyDeleteThe funny thing is that MP and I got along really well face to face. At least, I did. He may have been wishing me far, far away, but he was gracious enough not to say so.
Ne dirait-on pas "Tu es plein de merde, ou encore mieux, vous êtes plein de merde?"
ReplyDeletePaul, I thought it was like, "Tu as faim". Of course, I could be wrong.
ReplyDelete