Friday, November 6, 2009

Best Menopause Question Ever

Question:
How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light
bulb?

Woman's Answer:
One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out.

And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS!

But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !!

I'm sorry. What was the question?

In this story, I recognize myself in days past. Before you jump on me for being anti-women, remember that the post applies to me, and to me only, and to no other woman in the whole world. This is my story - up close and personal, and I laughed and laughed. You see, it RESONATED.

Besides, the title should be "Best Menopause Answer Ever".

Don't blame me. Blame Doug.

6 comments:

  1. LOL! Goodness, this certainly resonates with me also. Glad those days are over.

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  2. As one who is entering this stage of life's journey, I feel qualified to interject:

    And where the F%&K did I put that shirt I just tore off?

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  3. I am afraid it does not resonate with me. I know that because Sue-z told me so!

    LOL!!!

    FWIW
    jimB

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  4. Mary, enjoy the ride.

    Jim I've heard that there is such a thing as male menopause, and it goes on for a much longer time than women's menopause, more like 10 years. The symptoms are different, but a man can be hard to live with during that time - so I hear.

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  5. Every time I read that light bulb story it makes me laugh :)

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