Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Christmas Carols For The Psychologically Challenged

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Queens Disoriented Are

3. Amnesia --- I Don't Know if I'll be Home for Christmas

4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and ...

6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me

7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

8 . Full Personality Disorder-- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell You Why

9. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ---Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ..

10. Agoraphobia --- I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House

11. Senile Dementia --- Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My House in My Slippers and Robe

12. Oppositional Defiant Disorder --- I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House

13. Social Anxiety Disorder --- Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas while I Sit Here and Hyperventilate.

Don't blame me. Blame Doug. If you think the post is offensive, let me know. I laughed and didn't take offense, and, by now, you all know that I'm a little crazy.
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16 comments:

  1. motherameliaDecember 23, 2009 at 8:52 AM

    I thought it hilarious. I don't know why but I really liked Nos. 1 and 10.

    WV=mingran With only one grandchild I'm a mingran

    Merry Christmas.

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  2. June ButlerDecember 23, 2009 at 9:25 AM

    Thanks, Amelia. I wonder if No. 11 is a prediction of a real life future event.

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  3. AnnDecember 23, 2009 at 9:34 AM

    8 and 11 are my favorites. BTW - did you know that taking Vitamin D and B12 can improve memory issues? Our doc's mom they thought had Alzheimer's as her mind was so confused and forgetful. She had been living alone and not eating a balanced diet - once she moved to a supported living environment and started eating better + some supplements she lost all those symptoms. They discovered a vitamin deficiency was the cause.

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  4. AnonymousDecember 23, 2009 at 9:44 AM

    Not offensive at all.

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  5. June ButlerDecember 23, 2009 at 11:14 AM

    Ann, I take a daily multivitamin which includes both vitamins you mention. I hope that's enough. I also try to eat a healthy diet.

    Anon, thanks. If you make up a name, any name, and sign your comment next time you visit, that would be lovely.

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  6. whiteycatDecember 23, 2009 at 12:46 PM

    Love it! Thanks for the laugh.

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  7. PaulDecember 23, 2009 at 3:12 PM

    I was # 5 this year, looking for every undecorated part of our office and ways to do it up. Shared this with my office mates who also enjoyed it.

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  8. June ButlerDecember 23, 2009 at 3:14 PM

    Paul, I'm glad I gave ya'll something to do to pass the time. Laughing on my money is just fine with me.

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  9. Padre MickeyDecember 23, 2009 at 5:09 PM

    I liked that; it's those "O Antiphons" that are driving me crazy!

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  10. June ButlerDecember 23, 2009 at 5:23 PM

    Mickey! The O Antiphons are the joy of my Advent.

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  11. LindyDecember 23, 2009 at 5:32 PM

    You'd be crazy not to laugh at that.
    Well done, G'mere.

    ReplyDelete
  12. June ButlerDecember 23, 2009 at 5:38 PM

    Credit where credit is due. And Doug only gets the credit for sending me the list. He didn't make it up.

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  13. Padre MickeyDecember 23, 2009 at 8:13 PM

    I'm just giving you a hard time.

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  14. UnknownDecember 23, 2009 at 9:01 PM

    Giggle, giggle...giggle!

    ReplyDelete
  15. June ButlerDecember 23, 2009 at 9:28 PM

    Mickey, and you a priest. And so soon after the anniversary of your ordination.

    ReplyDelete
  16. DennisDecember 24, 2009 at 1:02 AM

    so many more we could add:


    Delusional Disorder: "...from now on our troubles will be out of sight..."

    Aspergers: "there is this thing I think called Joy or something and we are supposed to give it to the whole world. I guess. Whatever."

    Sleep Terror Disorder "It came upon a midnight clear..."

    Cocaine Dependence "I'm Dreaming of a" (wait, no, that's too easy. sorry)

    ADHD: "Jingle Bells Jingle Silent Night Holy Ni O little town Do you hear what O here we come a Wassailing..."

    ReplyDelete

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