Monday, February 22, 2010

MENTAL CHECKUP

It's that time of year for us to take our annual senior citizen test.

Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important to keep mentally alert. If you don't use it, you lose it! Below is a very private way to gauge how your memory compares to the last test. Some may think it is too easy, but the ones with memory problems may have some difficulty. Take the test presented here to determine if you're losing it or not. The spaces below are so you don't see the answers until you've made your answer.

OK, relax, clear your mind, and begin

Question 1. What do you put in a toaster?












Answer: 'bread.'

If you said 'toast' give up now and do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, bread, go to Question 2.

Question 2. Say 'silk' five times. Now spell 'silk.' What do cows drink?












Answer: Cows drink water.

If you said 'milk,' don't attempt the next question. Your brain is over-stressed and may even overheat. Content yourself with reading a more appropriate literature such as Sports Illustrated. However, if you said 'water', proceed to question 3.

Question 3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?












Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said 'green bricks,' why are you still reading these??? If you said 'glass,' go on to Question 4.

Question 4. It's twenty-five years ago, and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany (If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany ). Anyway, during the flight, three engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he can do so and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. The question: Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany, West Germany, or no man's land'?












Answer: You don't bury survivors.

If you said ANYTHING else, you're a dunce and you must stop. If you said, 'You don't bury survivors', proceed to the next question.

Question 5. (To be answered without using a calculator): You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales.
In London, 17 people get on the bus.
In Reading, 6 people get off the bus and 9 people get on.
In Swindon, 2 people get off and 4 get on.
In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea, 3 people get off and 5 people get on.
In Carmarthen, 6 people get off and 3 get on.
You then arrive at Milford Haven.












Without scrolling back to review, how old is the bus driver?










Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember your own age? It was YOU driving the bus!!

If you pass this along to your friends, pray they do better than you.

P.S.: 95% of people fail most of the questions!!


From Paul (A.), with no thanks from me.

25 comments:

  1. If you have a double-wide toaster, you can insert BAGELS.

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  2. I hate to tell you how I did. I am a hopeless nerd with very bad OCD. Draw your own conclusions.

    WV: dokiest

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  3. Susan, there are penalties for not obeying the rules.

    Off with her head!

    Too true, NancyP. Too true.

    Boocat, I didn't do well either.

    The other day I gave Paul (A.) a nice compliment, but I take it back now.

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  4. Got them all. But that's 'cause I know you are a sneaky lady and I am a sneaky bear and, God help the world, we think a lot alike. Teehee.

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  5. Might I suggest that the statistical data was gathered in the United States? Just a thought...

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  6. My answer to what cows drink is "gin". Not sure what that says about me. I think it's true though.

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  7. The expression "cow" refers to a FOUR-legged mammal in N America, Cathy.

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  8. ... I meant the four-legged variety, Roger - the two-legged variety drink cosmopolitans, I believe.

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  9. ... oh dear, that was a bit bitchy of me... :-/

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  10. Might I suggest that the statistical data was gathered in the United States?

    Ostrich, could be.

    Roger, what are female bovines called in England?

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  11. They're also called cows, Mimi (also "moos" - tho' that goes for the two-legs as well) but they don't, in my experience, drink gin.

    Seems I'm suffering from bloggers' identity confusion today.

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  12. Lapin, now you've given away your true identity - not that it was a secret before.

    Hey, Paul, up there, you sly bear, don't think you've slipped in your comment past my notice.

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  13. For a while I thought you'd taken umbrage at being called sneaky. Teehee.

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  14. I'd have gone over to my real name ages ago - I normally use it on certain blogs - except that the Lapin brand seems too fun a name to discard.

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  15. Roger, I'm rather fond of Weird Rabbit.

    Paul, yes. Great (and sneaky) minds....

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  16. Maybe best qualify that and add "most of the time", Mimi?

    Quite like my avatar for this sign-in, which is me, quarrying my nose, wearing a Victorian Cavalier page-boy suit. Taken a year or two back, I might add.

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  17. No, Grandmère, I rather obsessively-compulsively aced the thing.

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  18. Roger, yes. A year or two. First time I've heard the expression "quarrying my nose". I suppose that's English, too, or did you just make it up?

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  19. D'you know, I may have heard it or I may have made it up. Been using it for years and no longer remember. Is it on Google, I wonder? Look and see. More descriptive than one needs, perhaps?

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  20. Roger, I believe that a pretty description of that particular activity is not possible.

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  21. Yup. And let's not even start on the topic of folks who like to keep their fingers occupied while they're stopped in traffic.

    Expression doesn't show up on Google searches, so seems I may be to blame.

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  22. Missed the last one. The rest I'd heard before in some context or another. Developed a sort of tunnel vision adding and subtracting.

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