VASELINE

A man doing market research for the Vaseline Company knocked at the door and was greeted by a young woman with three small children running around at her feet. "I'm doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the product?"

She said, "Oh, yes. My husband and I use it all the time."

"If you don't mind my asking," he said, "what do you use it for?"

"We use it for sex," she said.

The researcher was a little taken aback. "Usually people lie to me and say they use it on a child's bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge. But, in fact, I know that most people do use it for sex. I admire you for your honesty. Since you've been so frank so far, can you tell me exactly HOW you use it for sex?"

The woman said, "I don't mind telling you at all. My husband and I put it on the doorknob and it keeps the kids out."


Cheers,

Paul (A.)

Ha ha ha.  You know who is to blame. 

I use Vaseline as a face cream, because I'm allergic to most other facial moisturizing products, including those that claim to be hypoallergenic.  Just saying.  :-)

HAPPY 200TH BIRTHDAY TO "PRIDE AND PREJUDICE"!

In a good many earlier posts, I've written of the enormous influence of Jane Austen's novels on my entire life.  The words below are excerpted and edited from my post titled. "It's Only a Novel".

As a 16 year old living in a tumultuous household, Jane Austen's novels were balm to my troubled soul. What sparkling wit! No fiction writer is Austen's equal in writing dialogue. What limpid prose! Reading Jane was sheer delight, not to mention that reading her books took me out of myself and out of my environment. After reading the first of her novels, which happened to be Pride and Prejudice, and which is still my favorite although I dearly love them all, I rushed to read the other five. I wanted to be Elizabeth Bennet. I read Jane's novels, and I read them again, and again, and again, up until now, and when I need cleansing and freshening from the load of drivel in print and on the tee-vee, I plunge into the novels and come away refreshed and renewed.  One last thing: I believe that reading Jane Austen's novels in my impressionable teen years contributed for the good to the formation of my moral center, which should give pause to anyone who says, "It's just a novel."

Jane's gift for irony is, to me, unsurpassed. Disclosure: my alcoholic and verbally abusive father had a gift for irony which was not always inflicted on his wife and daughters, and I learned from him to view our mad world through ironic eyes. I owe him for his gifts of books from an early age and for encouraging me to read by always having books and magazines around the house, even when my mother had to borrow grocery money from extended family. We never lacked for music, either. There's irony for you. To this day, I feel sorry for my poor mother's plight, but, in my heart of hearts, I can't regret that the books and music were present.

So.  My tribute to Jane Austen and her lovely novel, originally titled First Impressions, which is 200 years old today, is a rehash but is no less fervent and admiring than if I'd written the words today.

Thanks to MM for sending me the link to an article in The Atlantic, which shows covers of many different editions of P&P that have been published over the years.  

ELEPHANT REVIVAL - "NOSTALGIA"

Elephant Revival, was brought to my attention a couple of weeks ago, and I thought their sound was terrific, so I ordered their album, "Break in the Clouds." The song in the video, performed at the Americana Music Festival and filmed by Music Fog, is, as yet, unreleased.

THE EPISCOPAL CHURCH IN SOUTH CAROLINA

Click for the larger view

When the former leaders of the Episcopal diocese left the church, they initiated a suit to keep the name, assets, and property of the diocese in their control. A judge issued a temporary restraining order yesterday.

A state judge this week issued a temporary restraining order saying the diocese is the only group that can use the name Episcopal Diocese of South Carolina. A hearing on whether to make the order permanent is set for next month in Columbia. So one of the things the group must do is give themselves a working title.

Again from The Lead:

A photo from the convention of the Episcopal Church in South Carolina - temporary name for the diocese and missing seal.

I hope and pray the loyal Episcopalians in the original diocese in South Carolina will have their name restored, but, in any case, life goes on in the continuing diocese.  "A rose by any other name would smell as sweet."  Their choice of a working title is excellent.

The faithful members of the diocese met in convention and elected a provisional bishop:

The Most Reverend Katharine Jefferts Schori was celebrant and preacher at a Choral Eucharist that opened the Convention. After his installation, Bishop [Charles Glenn] vonRosenberg addressed the Convention. The Reverend Gay Clark Jennings, President of the House of Deputies of The Episcopal Church, also addressed the Convention. She was one of many Church leaders from across the nation who traveled to Charleston to show support for continuing Episcopalians in South Carolina.

----------------------

Welcome!

The Episcopal Church in South Carolina is continuing. We are reorganizing with renewed dedication to carry forward the work of our Lord Jesus Christ, just as prior generations have done since 1789. We have much to do and  many challenges to meet, but we are confident that by moving forward together in unity and faith, with God's help, we will flourish.

Your participation in this new ministry is encouraged. The Episcopal Church always welcomes you!

Blessings and prayers for Bishop Glenn and the continuing members of the historic diocese.  May the peace of God that passes all understanding keep their hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

STORY OF THE DAY - VOICE OF REASON

Sometimes I think I should just keep my opinions 

to myself, she said, but someone has got to be the 

voice of reason.

From StoryPeople.

I HEAR YOU KNOCKING - FATS DOMINO

Friday night with Fats Domino.

Antoine Dominique "Fats" Domino Jr. (born February 26, 1928) is an American R&B and rock and roll pianist and singer-songwriter. He was born and raised in New Orleans, Louisiana. Domino is French Creole and Creole was his first language. Domino was delivered at home by his midwife grandmother. Like most families in the Lower Ninth Ward, Domino's family were new arrivals from Vacherie, Louisiana.  His father was a well known violinist, and Domino was inspired to play himself. He eventually learned from his uncle, jazz guitarist Harrison Verrett.  Fats released five gold (million-copy-selling) records before 1955.  Domino also had 35 Top 40 American hits and has a music style based on traditional R&B ensembles of bass, piano, electric guitar, drums, and saxophone.

UN LAUNCHES INVESTIGATION ON DRONE ATTACKS

The United Nations has launched an investigation into the use of unmanned drone strikes and targeted killings in counterterrorism operations.

The probe will investigate 25 strikes in Pakistan, Yemen, Somalia, Afghanistan, and the Palestinian territories. It also will focus on civilian killings and injuries caused by the strikes.

British lawyer Ben Emmerson, the U.N. special envoy on counterterrorism and human rights, will carry out the probe.

Emmerson says the use of drone technology is "here to it stay," adding it is imperative that "appropriate legal and operational structures are urgently put in place to regulate its use."

Most attacks by unmanned drones have been carried out by the United States.  Israel has used them and other nations have access to the technology. 

It's about time.  Although President Obama did not mention the drone war in his inaugural address, the drone attacks in Pakistan, Yemen, and Somalia may well kill terrorists, but the attacks also kill innocents, including women, children, and people who happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.  The attacks are not as precise as the administration claims.  In addition, fear of drone attacks traumatizes people who live in the areas where the attacks occur.  It's accountability time, and I hope the investigation by the UN sheds more light than the Obama administration has been willing to do.

JESUS AND MO - GUESS

 

Click on the strip for the larger view.

From Jesus and Mo.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GRANDPÈRE!

May you have a great day, Tom!

My gift to Tom will be a nice pair of jeans.  When we go out to eat or to a movie, Tom will often ask if he can wear his jeans, and I have to say, "No, not with me."  People wear jeans nearly everywhere, but Tom's jeans are another matter.  They're from Walmart, which would not be so bad, but they usually have holes in them or are stained with black grease or blood from the many small and not-so-small wounds he accumulates from his yard work.  The other day, I persuaded him to go to a store other than Walmart to try on nicer jeans.  It took us a while and many tries before he found a pair that suited him, so now he has one pair that he can wear to a restaurant or a movie and look decent.  Now that I know the style and size, I will buy him another pair for his birthday, and he will have two, which should do nicely for now.

Tom doesn't like to have too much made of his birthday, because it's sort of a sad day for him, since he's one year older, but I see birthdays as a reason for celebrating having made it through another year more or less intact.  Glass half-full or half-empty?   

He's off working at the boat center today.  He was on TV a few nights ago on Channel 8 in New Orleans.  The reporters visited the center and did a fine job with a lovely news piece on the museum during the nightly news.    

FOX 8 WVUE New Orleans News, Weather, Sports New Orleans News, Weather, Sports

NEW BUBBLE SITES AT BAYOU CORNE SINKHOLE

 

BAYOU CORNE — Eleven new bubble sites have been found in inundated swampland west of an 8.5-acre sinkhole in northern Assumption Parish, including a frothing spot dubbed the “mother of all bubble sites,” officials said Tuesday.

The sites are roughly in a row west of an unnamed oilfield access road extending south from La. 70 South through the wooded swamp, a parish map shows.

The sites bring to 34 the number of known bubble sites in the Bayou Corne and Grand Bayou areas in the vicinity of the sinkhole on Texas Brine Co. LLC’s leased property.

My guess is that the people who were ordered to evacuate from their homes last year will very likely never be able to return.  The troubling situation in the area is worsening, and who knows when or where it will end?  I wonder if further numbers of residents of nearby areas may be asked to leave.  Highway 70, a much used road, is near the sinkhole activity.  If the highway is impacted and forced to close, it will greatly inconvenience workers and travelers in the area. 

The "mother of all bubble sites"

If we take stuff out from under the ground beneath us, why are we surprised when the ground beneath us collapses?  When will we ever learn?