Overcoming

From the Southwest City Journal:
Erica Burrus Photo/ Alyse Gordon

By Julie Randle

When a child comes out of the closet it's never easy.

They can face threats, harassment and violence from peers. Friends may ostracize them and family may not accept them.

When Alyse Gordon declared she was a lesbian at age 15, she had an easier time than some others did, she said. However, the 18-year-old Mehlville resident still dealt with her own struggles.Gordon was able to avoid the ostracism from friends and family. She was never threatened and she was never a target for violence. But she knows others who were threatened at school, who endured sexual slurs and who were even beaten.

Alyse was one of the finalists for the Dillenkoffer Endowment scholarship, set up in memory of my beloved sister, Gayle, who passed away in April of last year from pancreatic cancer. The statement at the website of the Dillenkoffer Endowment states:

The Dillenkoffer Endowment was formed to support gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered teens with college tuition grants in Kansas and Missouri.

The members of the committee, which includes my brother-in-law, Frank, Gayle's husband and the friend who spearheaded the formation of the endowment, had difficulty in making their choice, since all of the finalists were outstanding young people. Their names are:

Ryan Wilson of Minneapolis, Kansas - four-year scholarship of $10,000 per year
Rachel Gadd-Nelson of Kansas City, Kansas - one-year scholarship of $1,000
Alyse Gordon of St. Louis, Missouri - one-year scholarship of $1,000
Jordan Timm of Marion, Kansas - one-year scholarship of $1,000

I met the finalists at the dinner and reception this past May, when the scholarships were awarded, and all were fine young people. Most teens search for acceptance amongst their peers, and GLBT teens have a much harder time finding that acceptance.

Believe it or not, as old as I am, I can still remember being a teenager, and it was not all fun and games. Sometimes it was hard. That these four young people chose to be open and honest about their sexual orientation during their high school years attests to their courage, and I'm sure they paid a price. On the other hand, they were spared the baggage of carrying around hidden secrets.

Alyse is a smart, articulate, and beautiful young woman, and although her parents and friends were supportive, she has had her share of difficulties.

That doesn't mean that Gordon had an easy time of it. As a teenager she struggled with depression, suicide and self-mutilation. She pulled out of a downward spiral when she was hospitalized.

She has overcome.

I am so proud of these young people who have succeeded in the face of enormous difficulties. I pray and wish for the best for them and that they will come through their struggles finer and stronger people and serve as examples to those who follow them.

Gayle would have loved that her memory is honored by this endowment. I know that she looks down with great satisfaction to see that those who loved her have chosen this type of memorial for her.

The plaque on the right sidebar leads to the site of the Dillenkoffer Endowment. Some of you have heard the story of the endowment in an earlier, post, but when I saw the article on Alyse, I wanted to say once again that I am proud to have met her and the other young men and woman who received the awards.