Let's Call The Whole thing Off
Fred Astaire
(words by Ira Gershwin; music by George Gershwin)
Introduced by Fred Astaire and Ginger rogers in the film "Shall We Dance?"
(verse)
Things have come to a pretty pass,
Our romance is growing flat,
For you like this and the other
While I go for this and that.
Goodness knows what the end will be;
Oh, I don't know where I'm at...
It looks as if we two will never be one,
Something must be done.
(refrain)
You say eether and I say eyether,
You say neether and I say nyther;
Eether, eyether, neether, nyther,
Let's call the whole thing off!
You like potato and I like potahto,
You like tomato and I like tomahto;
Potato, potahto, tomato, tomahto!
Let's call the whole thing off!
But oh! If we call the whole thing off,
Then we must part.
And oh! If we ever part,
Then that might break my heart!
So, if you like pajamas and I like pajahmas,
I'll wear pajamas and give up pajahmas.
For we know we need each other,
So we better call the calling off off.
Let's call the whole thing off!
You say laughter and I say lawfter,
You say after and I say awfter;
Laughter, lawfter, after, awfter,
Let's call the whole thing off!
You like vanilla and I like vanella,
You, sa's'parilla and I sa's'parella;
Vanilla, vanella, Choc'late, strawb'ry!
Let's call the whole thing off!
But oh! If we call the whole thing off,
Then we must part.
And oh! If we ever part,
Then that might break my heart!
So, if you go for oysters and I go for ersters
I'll order oysters and cancel the ersters.
For we know we need each other,
So we better call the calling off off!
Let's call the whole thing off!
Last verse:
ReplyDeleteYou say it's sodomy and I like autonomy,
You, catholicity, and I, inclusivity;
Sodomy, autonomy, catholicity, inclusivity!
Let's call the whole thing off!
Mimi! How could you have beaten The Mad One to this wonderful observation? Right on target. Brava.
ReplyDeleteRick, brilliant! You're in the wrong profession. With talent like this what are you doing practicing law?
ReplyDeleteI guess I should give up on the idea of a dignified blog.
David, yes! I scooped the Mad One.
Hey, you gave us the template. I just filled in the blanks.
ReplyDeleteAs best I could. I'm afraid my son took off with my rhyming dictionary.
Perfect.
ReplyDeletePerfect and you are quoted as a blog to read on Episcopal Cafe. Brava!!
ReplyDeleteJust don't call off the ersters! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, all of you. I am humbled by the link from the Episcopal Cafe. I knew something was happening, because my numbers were going up.
ReplyDeleteMayor Robert Maestri of New Orleans to FDR when he visited the city:
"Mr. President, how ya like dem ersters?"
This is a true story - or so I'm told.
Brava, Mimi! Bravo, Rick!
ReplyDeleteMimi--can one not be funny with dignity?
Nina, that's a deep philosophical question, and it's late. I will have to put that one on hold for now.
ReplyDeleteYou know I'm gonna be humming this all day - and that ain't no bad thing.....
ReplyDeleteFB, (or is it Freda?) it ain't no bad thing at all to be humming that song. Maybe if enough folks hum it, you-know-who might overhear.
ReplyDeleteMimi and Rick--Bravo!
ReplyDeleteIt certainly is perfect. All that sweet wit describes precisely what it's all about.
ReplyDelete(Thanks, too, for the Fred and Ginger memories. Back in the early days of VCRs, I taped several of the Astaire-Rogers movies from late night t.v. and later played them and "danced" along with my colicky infant son on many lonely, difficult nights. It brought us both much needed peace and good humor.)
So I'm a little late seeing this (very very busy week. sorry.) This is just brilliant.
ReplyDeletelike Freedom Bound, I'm also going to have this tune in my head all day.
Fred Astaire, justly famed for his dancing, is greatly underrated as a singer. As a vocal stylist, he was one of the best.
ReplyDeleteKlady, the colicky infant and Fred Astaire! Why didn't I think of that?
Dennis, you deserve a rest after your two week stint at hard blogging, but apparently you are pressed into other hard work. Sorry about that.
And of course the old line about Ginger Rogers...she did everything Fred did but backwards and in high heels and made it look effortless.
ReplyDeleteWonderful, Mimi (and Rick)!
Cynthia, yes! Ginger did it backwards and in high heels. You guys must never forget that.
ReplyDeleteI'm excepting the guys among you who wear high heels and dance backwards. You know what it's was like for Ginger.
And, to add an irrelevant but personal note, Ginger Rogers was also, for reasons I never quite fathomed, a trustee for the college I attended--Austin College, in Sherman, Texas. So--brains, in addition to dancing circles around Fred. And an unexpected touch of glamor on the arid plains of North Texas.
ReplyDeleteRick, I could tell she was smart just from watching her in the movies. She knew what the guys were about.
ReplyDeleteMy best friend's mother was from Sherman, Texas. The cosmopolitan New Orleanian side of the family used to tease her unmercifully about that.
They were absolutely right to do so (though the college, I must add, is an excellent one).
ReplyDeleteYou know, Mimi...it's looking more and more as if we'll have a huge group of Episcopalians next summer staging a Pride Parade outside of Lambeth, and I'm going to volunteer my services. SOMEone will have to train that motley group how to sing "Let's Call the Whole Thing Off," and, being under considerable pressure to take this on, I've agreed to do it!
ReplyDeleteOnly one problem though... we'll need a choreographer who can get us all to dance the Rogers/Astaire steps as we circle the Palace. It will be like a huuuuge Rockets number!
Oh, Bob Fosse (of blessed memory), we NEED you.
Volunteers?
make that "Rockettes"
ReplyDeleteWhoa, David, thanks for the correction. I thought for a minute you were going to be shooting people into the air - Ã la human cannonballs - and I was not about to volunteer.
ReplyDeleteIf I'm to be a part of the demonstration, my only stipulation is that whatever the gender of the dancers, that one of the pair wear high heels and dance backward. It's the only right way to do the Fred and Ginger thing.
I suppose you're right, Mimi. But I was operating under the assumption that the "dancing backwards" would be going on INSIDE the Palace.
ReplyDeleteI've found dignity to be an overrated commodity.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on this piece of brilliance, and on making The Big Time
I just googled the dates for Lambeth---I'm going to be in England visiting my mother then!!!
ReplyDeleteDCH--sign me up. I have two left feet, but what I lack in grace, I make up for in enthusiasm! ;-)
Eileen, thanks. I think dignity is overrated, too, or I would not stray from it so often.
ReplyDeleteDoxy, wonderful! Will you be wearing high heels and dancing backwards?
Mimi---can't do the high heels (bum ankle and knee), but my backwards dancing won't be any worse than my forwards...so, sure. ;-)
ReplyDeleteDoxy, I'm sorry, but we gotta have the high heels and dancing backwards together. You can be a Fred, but not a Ginger, OK?
ReplyDeleteI understand, because I cannot do the high heels thing either, therefore, I will have to be a Fred, too.
Our youth director at church is a dance instructor in her other life. She has been giving dance lessons at church to raise money for the J2A pilgrimmage, and I've been taking lessons.
ReplyDeleteThe joke among all the males in the class is "All right, Doxy...I'M the one who is supposed to be leading!"
So, apparently, I make a much better Fred anyway... ;-)
Doxy, perhaps we could recruit the youth director to be our choreographer and dance teacher.
ReplyDeleteHey, some of you gay or straight guys, are you up for doing dress-up in the high heels for the Ginger parts? We seem to be somewhat lacking in females who can step up to the plate.
This is how change happens.
ReplyDeleteIt used to be: "Does s/he sing in the choir?"
Then it was: "I see there are a lot of Friends of Dorothy here."
So now it's: "Are you a Fred or a Ginger."
And soon it will be: "Which one dances backward?"
Perhaps it's time to submit these to OED.
So, then, it's settled. I think we've got a production crew for next summer. Doxy's Youth Director will choreograph and teach everyone how to dance. And I'll teach them how to sing. (Note that I did *not* say: "direct the choir." Please see previous post.)
ReplyDeleteBut who will take responsibility for being Costume Designer? Doxy? I loved that skirt over at The Mad One's.
And finally, here's something about Lambeth I think we can all agree on. It goes without saying that the role of Director and Producer should go to our own, one and only, Mimi the Magnificent. Can we all agree on that? After all, this whole thing is her fault!
David, I don't think I could handle the producer-director bit. I have no skill for getting other people to do things, nor do I have organizational skills. We need a volunteer for that role, too.
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking Dennis, since he did such a masterful job of putting the whole "Of course, I Could Be On Vacation" thing together.
Whatever grandmere decides, as usual, then?
ReplyDeleteAs so many of us are poor at dancing backward in high heels, we could think of having one great Fred&Ginger couple (or a few) to do the dancing, and the rest of us make up the chorus! I volunteer for the chorus. Also, we can get dressed at my apartment.
ReplyDeleteI also volunteer to scope out the site and find a good open space for the performance.
Oh, Sister Mary Clara, you are a gift. A scoper with an apartment! Will your apartment be large enough to hold the hordes that we expect to participate?
ReplyDeleteI will definitely take under advisement your idea about limiting the star dancers to a few, unless, of course, prima donnas and primo dons arise among us and demand the spotlight.
Well, Sister Mary Clara's cell is not huge, but let's see who all turns up! I do has me some nice (very un-nunlike) mirrors and an iron and ironing board and a little sewing kit in case of any last-minute costume adjustments.
ReplyDeletePer Lambeth Conference website, the meeting is to take place at the University of Kent. If there are too many of us to change at my place, never mind, I know where the bathrooms are on the campus.
Isn't it amazing how easy it is to get a bunch of grown up people to play let's pretend? I love it.
. . .(sigh) about the shoes. I don't go in for past lives, but I like to believe that I may currently be leading alternative lives in parallel universes. In one of these I wear wonderful high-heeled shoes whenever I like and it doesn't hurt my feet or throw my back out, and I don't fall down and break my neck on the cobblestoned streets in the trendy urban neighborhood where I live.
The nice thing is, Jesus is there too and the same as always, only perhaps with different footwear. (No, he is not dancing backward in heels. Unless of course he wants to.)
And Jesus would never wear red Prada shoes.
ReplyDeleteI believe you are right, Mimi. Not even in a parallel universe.
ReplyDelete