HUMOR FOR LOGOPHILES

LOGOPHILES: WHOEVER PUT THIS TOGETHER LOVES LANGUAGE

To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

          When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
        
           A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
         
           When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U. C. L. A.

The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

The batteries were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a dead giveaway.

If you don't pay your exorcist, you can get repossessed.

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft, and I'll show you A-flat miner.

You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.

A boiled egg is hard to beat.

When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

Police were called to a day care where a three year old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

In a democracy, it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your count that votes.

If you take a laptop computer for a run, it could jog your memory.

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

The guy who fell in an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

          Acupuncture is a jab well done. 

 My brother-in-law sent the list with a note saying that I may have seen these before.  True.  In fact, I have posted some of the funnies before, but what the hell!  I laughed all over again at them, so thanks, Frank.