What's He Gonna Be?

An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. But like many young men, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it, either.

One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table four objects: a Bible, a silver dollar, a bottle of whiskey, and a Playboy magazine.

"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself, "and when he comes home from school this afternoon, I'll see which object he picks up. If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher just like me and what a blessing that would be! If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too. But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunkard, and, Lord, what a shame that would be. And worst of all, if he picks up that magazine he's gonna be a skirt-chasin' bum."

The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room.

The boy tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he noticed the objects on the table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them. Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. Furtively looking around, he picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket. Then he uncorked the bottle and took a big drink as he sat down on his bed and opened up the magazine to the centerfold.

"Lord have mercy," the old preacher disgustedly whispered to himself, "he's gonna run for Congress!"

Don't blame me, blame Doug.