TEACHER: Why are you late?Erika strikes again!
STUDENT: Class started before I got here.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this child)
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I'.
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand...
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TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, sir. It's the same dog.
(I want to adopt this kid!!!)
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
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Due to current economic conditions the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off…………
And I just want to say that, all too often, church starts before I get there.
And to think that I gave up teaching to be a priest! ;-)
ReplyDeleteMarez, you can give us some priest stories, I'm sure. Nothing under the seal, of course. ;-)
ReplyDeleteLove these, Mimi! I'm with you. I have trouble getting to the 10:30 service on time. Very slow revving up the engine in the morning!
ReplyDeletewhiteycat, how nice to discover a kindred spirit. I move very slowly in the morning. Our service is at 10:30, too, and few would believe it could be such a challenge. It's not that I sleep late, it's just hard for me to get going.
ReplyDeleteI actually get up by 7:15 for a 10:30 service. The old bones just creak for a couple of hours before they loosen up sufficiently for the day at hand. Definitely we are kindred spirits.
ReplyDeletewhiteycat, it's the up and out part that is so difficult for me.
ReplyDeleteI am always on time for the 10:30 service, but that's because I am usually late for the 9:30 choir rehearsal.
ReplyDeleteOh, yes, Mimi, I have lots of priest stories too! I try not to be late to our services... but then, if I were to be late, people like you wouldn't have to worry about being on time! ;-)
ReplyDeleteMarez, like you, the priest at my church is a bit too punctual for my tastes, but what can I do?
ReplyDeleteWe have a wonderful adult class at 9:15, to which I am now unable to drag myself. When I did, I was on time for the 10:30 service. I wasn't always like this. ;-)