GOTTA LOVE SENIORS

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?"

"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."

"Oh, I understand," I said.. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup."

"No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"
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A short neurological test

1- Find the C below.. Please do not use any cursor help.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

2- If you already found the C, now find the 6 below.

9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
6999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

3 - Now find the N below. It's a little more difficult.

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

This is NOT a joke.. If you were able to pass these 3 tests, you can cancel your annual visit to your neurologist. Your brain is great and you're far from having a close relationship with Alzheimer.

Congratulations!

Thanks or blame to Ann.

THE BISHOP OF BRAY

In good Pope Benny's golden days,
When Loyalty no harm meant;
A Furious High-Church man I was,
And so I gain'd Preferment.
Unto my Flock I daily Preach'd,
Popes are by God appointed,
And Damn'd are those who dare resist,
Or touch the Lord's Anointed.

And this is law, I will maintain
Unto my Dying Day, Sir.
That whatsoever Pope may reign,
I will be the Bishop of Bray, Sir!

The name of the Bishop of Bray is Legion, because there are many of them.

Note: With apologies to 'The Vicar of Bray'.

'GO OUT IN THE STREETS...'

H/T to Andrew Gerns, who posted the video at The Lead.

I agree with Diana Butler Bass, and I have placed her book, Christianity After Religion, on my wish list. People are hungry for God, hungry for fellowship, but in this uncertain age, the church will need to work out ways of going out to where people are, rather than placing the entire focus on getting people to come into our places of worship. I'm not at all suggesting that the church abandon services in the buildings. I see going out to the people with Ashes to Go, prayer services, and perhaps even eucharistic services as an addition to in-church services. Who knows but that some of the folks out there might one day come into the building, but the goal should be to serve folks outside the buildings by providing worship and proclamation of the Gospel for them in a community, however temporary the gathering may be.

CHILDREN ARE QUICK

TEACHER: Why are you late?

STUDENT: Class started before I got here.
____________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
____________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this child)
____________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
____________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!
____________________________________
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
____________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I'.

MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'

MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
____________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand...
____________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
____________________________________
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE: No, sir. It's the same dog.
(I want to adopt this kid!!!)
____________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher
____________________________________
Due to current economic conditions the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off…………

Erika strikes again!

And I just want to say that, all too often, church starts before I get there.

IS IT BLOGGER? IS IT GOOGLE?

My annoyance at having to type the word verification over and over is coming to a boil. Which entity is responsible for the repeated message?

The characters you entered didn't match the word verification. Please try again.

I'm careful when I type the word verification, and I'm quite sure I don't do typos every single time I try to leave a comment. Two tries is the absolute minium, and sometimes the number goes up to 4 or 5.

Hey guys, whoever you are wherever you are, it's way past time to fix the glitch. The folks who comment at my blog complain. I am complaining. No passing the buck here. Just fix the problem.

A WONDERFUL PERFORMANCE BY A LADY WITH A GREAT TALENT

Fever!! A classic recording from the late 60's. Featuring Peggy with Max Bennett (bass) and Jack Sperling (drums).Written originally by Davenport and Cooley, Peggy added her own lyrics and the finger snapping and beat. Little Willie John released this in its original form a couple of years before Peggys version.

From puglet7.

STORY OF THE DAY - EQUAL TREATMENT

Why do they treat us like children? they
said & I said why do you treat them like
adults? & their eyes opened wide & they
began to laugh & talk all at once &
suddenly everything looked possible
again.

The story of the day brings to mind a group of so-called adults who treat other adults as children, which is a caution to all of us not to treat the so-called adults like adults, unless we like being treated like children.

From StoryPeople.

AN EVENING WITH CABLE NEWS

In the evening, you generally will not find me watching the cable news shows, but tonight I decided to tune in. On Lawrence O'Donnell's show, I heard Ann Coulter compare Mitt Romney to a Ken doll. I made the same comparison a few weeks ago. To discover that my mind runs on the same track as Coulter was sobering, indeed.

Then I saw a clip of the old interview with Mitt, in which Chris Wallace questioned him about riding his dog Seamus on the roof of his station wagon, 'What were you thinking?' Romney said that the kennel in which his Irish setter rode was air tight, and the dog loved riding in it and jumped right up and into the kennel when they were ready to roll. The dog was so happy that he pooped, and the poop ran right down the back window of the vehicle. Presumably, the kennel allowed Seamus to breathe, because the poor setter survived the trip.

I think I'll go back to not watching cable news.

UPDATE: Ann V sent me the link to the Dogs Against Romney website. In their store, the group sells clever t-shirts, bumper stickers, and more. A selection from the bumper stickers say:

Mitt is Mean
Crate-Gate
Get "Ruff" with Romney

Click on the shirt for the larger view.

I fear Romney will lose the dog vote, along with the dog lovers vote.

And one more thing: 'The Saturday Night Live' video.

ASBO JESUS - COPE

Click on the cartoon for the larger view.

Oh yes! I can relate.

From ASBO Jesus.

HAPPY ST VALENTINE'S DAY!

What? No hearts and flowers?

Grandpère and I decided to give each other Maine lobster dinners to celebrate St Valentine's Day. Bubba's II Restaurant, which is quite near our house, imports live Maine lobsters every couple of months. Yummy!