A Lovely Gift In The Comments

Brian R said...

Lord, you are in all of your creation. Protect and guide Mimi as she sets out to travel. Make her ways safe and her homecomings joyful. Let her have your wisdom so that she makes good and right choices in all the places that she goes. Give her safe traveling companions and let her not be lonely. Amen.

Thank you from my heart, Brian.

"Anglican Maladies"

Click on over to Tobias' post on Anglican Maladies. All I'll say is that I'm glad that Tobias and I are on the same side in most of the controversies swirling around in Anglican Land, because I would not want him as my opponent.

Vile, Just Vile!

From CNN:

Former Vice President Dick Cheney told CNN's John King Sunday that he believed President Obama's decision to eliminate the use of many of the most controversial interrogation practices used under the former administration had put the country at risk.

Asked whether he thought those moves had made the United States less safe, Cheney said he did. "I think those programs were absolutely essential to the success we enjoy, of being able to collect the intelligence that let us defeat all further attempts to launch attacks against the United States since 9/11," he said on State of the Union. "I think it's a great success story. It was done legally, it was done in accordance with our constitutional practices and principles…"

Why doesn't Dick Cheney shut up and slink back into his undisclosed location?

H/T to TPM.

UPDATE: Ann in the comments suggests this article in the Harvard Magazine as a better and more principled manner of doing counterterrorism than the Cheney method.

Rock Of Ages

This morning, I arrived at church late again. My clergy friends, you would probably consider me a very annoying parishioner. Some of you lay folks would, very likely, not appreciate my habitual tardiness either. I try to enter quietly and not make a fuss, but still....

Busy as I was, and late as I was, I had to go to church this morning. I have a great longing for the Eucharist, and I didn't want to miss altogether. Plus, my priest prayed with me for a safe trip, which I wanted very much, too.

The Lenten hymns seemed somewhat dreary today, so when we sang "Rock of Ages" for our closing hymn, it was close to a jubilation for me. Besides, I very much needed to be reminded of the Rock of Ages.

Things I'll Take With Me

 

On the left of the picture is the cell phone that Dennis (Dear Heart!) sent me. I'd link to his blog, but he seems not to be writing there at this time, since he's focusing on his dissertation, which is absolutely the right thing to do. He bought it in France and tells me that with a SIM card for England, it should work there. I'll need to buy the SIM card and some minutes, and I'll be good to go. Above it is the adapter plug, which I will need to charge the phone, since it has the French plug.

In the center is the 120/240 curling iron, which I have used in Europe, not sure about England, which switches automatically between US and European voltages without a converter. The adapter plug fits the curling iron, too.

On the right is the curling iron which I bought in England, has the proper English plug, and which I know won't blow the iron or the hotel wiring, but it is old. I also tend to burn myself with that type of curling iron. I'm trying to decide which curling iron to take.

The hotel provides a hair dryer, so I don't need to carry that along.

Trivia at its worst, I know.

I'm flying into Manchester. From there I'll take the train to Leeds, where I'll stay at my hotel for the entire time, poke around Leeds and take day trips from there to other nearby places that seem interesting. I don't like packing and unpacking my suitcases and sleeping in different places every night or so. I have a few excursions already planned, but I don't want to give details online.

Have I said that Doorman-Priest and his lovely wife have taken me up as a project to make my stay in England as enjoyable as possible? If I have, it's worth saying again, because there is no way that I can repay them for their many kindnesses, and I'm not even there yet.

Doug And I Sink To Lowest Point

Q: How do you trap a polar bear?

A: Cut a hole in the ice. Line it with peas. When the bear bends over to take a pea, kick him in the icehole.


Redemption from the following?


Walking 20 minutes can add to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.

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My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where he is.
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I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
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I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing..
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I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.
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Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
************************************************************************

I do have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

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The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say, 'Well, he looks good doesn't he?'
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If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.
************************************************************************

I know I got a lot of exercise the last few years ... just getting over the hill.
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We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
************************************************************************


I don't think so!

Why I Am Episcopalian

Both videos are taken from the website I Am Episcopalian. Most of the brief statements by folks explaining why they are Episcopalians are quite good.

However, I discovered that the embed code that I copied for the two videos that I chose to post did not work for me at my blog when I hit "Publish". I got an "Error" message. I know next to nothing about computer codes, but when I added a closure for the "embed" at the end of the code, I was able to post. Perhaps, I was doing something wrong, but if I get something to work that wasn't working before, I run with it.

Then, when I did get the videos to post, both started automatically and at the same time. I suppose the code needs fixing there, too, or, once again, I'm doing something wrong. So what I advise is to hit the "Stop" button on one, watch the other, and then hit the "Start" button on the other to watch it. Thus endeth the (no doubt, very wrong) computer code lesson. But hey! It works for me. I hope it works for you.

Thanks to advice from Ann in the comments, I fixed the code so that the videos do not start automatically, so disregard the directions above.


Bishop Charles Jenkins of the Diocese of Louisiana tells a story to illustrate why he is Episcopalian.




And then, Mark Harris at Preludium tells his own story of why he is Episcopalian.



Both are good commercials for the Episcopal Church, don't you think? You may want to watch some of the other videos at the website.

Remembering Eric - 2nd Anniversary Of His Death

Dear Grandmère Mimi,

Thank you for this opportunity to tell our story. Perhaps it will serve as a cautionary tale, to warn other families who naively trust their own church to “do the right thing” regarding clergy sexual abuse.

Ours is still a very painful story, two years after Eric's untimely death. His is the story of a young gay man, who felt called to priesthood in the Orthodox Church in America (hereafter the OCA). We’re convinced that Eric is just one of many young LGBT’s who have been sexually abused by opportunistic clergy in the various churches over the years.

Eric, like his sisters was raised Roman Catholic. As a teenager he followed his dad into the Orthodox Church; his mom and sisters remained Catholic. Eric’s story is basically the tragic intersection of a devout, socially conscious and intelligent young man with a troubled married priest, Fr. Timothy Blumentritt and an equally troubled Orthodox Church jurisdiction “the OCA”. Fr. Blumentritt was responsible for Pastoral Care of all students at St. Vladimir's Orthodox Theological Seminary in Crestwood, NY. Eric went to Fr. Tim, his 'spiritual father', for counseling to deal with childhood issues. Like many of his fellow seminarians, Eric was an ACOA, an Adult Child of an Alcoholic.

Basically, as told to us by our son, this priest/counselor breached appropriate counselor-counselee boundaries, POKROV.ORG justifying this sexual abuse as a bizarre form of "reparative therapy". This "grooming" was all on the sly, and after nearly a year and a half of this treatment, Eric blew the whistle on this horrible exploitation of ‘spiritual fatherhood’. He also told us that "Fr. Tim" monitored his phone calls, web surfing and emails in his attempt to control Eric's life. Then Eric told us that the Church and seminary used this same information to pressure him into signing off on the legal release. The one (!) priest in the whole Orthodox Church in America (OCA) jurisdiction charged with investigating claims of sexual misconduct, was uncertified [the OCA's own governing body, the Metropolitan Council acknowledges this to be a fact], and has recently been dismissed from these duties. See here and here.

Many Orthodox jurisdictions have clergy sexual abuse policies which in practice appear to not be worth the paper on which they’re printed. Signing a legal release was the price our trusting son paid for getting this man defrocked (and which we consider a mere slap on the wrist). See POKROV.ORG

Only shortly before this, Eric formally came out to his family and told us of the abuse. If you go to OCANews, you’ll see this church’s administration and hierarchy have long been compromised by financial misappropriation and other improprieties.

Eric finished his MDiv degree, but by then was affected by PTSD and rapidly descending into depression. After graduation he moved home and was employed locally for a short time. But in spite of meds and intense counseling he could no longer work. He had no history of depression before the abuse. After it came out publicly that he was suing his Church and Seminary, the malicious speculation, gossip and re-victimization began in earnest. He was called all sorts of utter shit, a seducer of priests, etc. etc. See OCANews Archives.

A few clergy and laity publicly came to his defense, notably Cappy Larson and Melanie Sakoda from POKROV.ORG who are moms of sexual abuse survivors in the Orthodox Church in America (OCA).You can't imagine how completely devastated Eric was to realize that he was abandoned and a pariah in the church he loved!

Just weeks later, very early on Monday, March 12th, Eric quietly disappeared. We were absolutely frantic. He drove to Indiana, purchased a shotgun, and came back here to a local motel, and shot himself to death in the early morning hours of Tuesday, March 13th, 2007. Our coroner told us that his body was surrounded by his bible, prayer book, and pictures of himself and his family. She pointedly told us, 'There was no fetishism; Eric clearly had a prayer service before ending his pain'.

The funeral was closed casket. We were grateful for the many seminarians who drove out through a blizzard to come to his funeral.

Fortunately, our family went into grief counseling right away, with a counselor having much expertise working with victims of sexual abuse, and their families. We also became involved in SNAP SNAP (Survivors Network of Those Abused By Priests) and appreciate their on-going support. We've found the leadership of SNAP to be fully supportive, and not the least bit inhibited when we tell them Eric’s entire story. They know there is virtually no connection between the sexual abuse of vulnerable adults & sexual orientation. It's only about CONTROL, exploitation and the abuse of power, using "sex" as the convenient "humiliator".

An insightful saying in SNAP is:

“Clergy Sexual Abuse is no more about 'sex', than the Bataan Death March was about ‘marching’.“

What I haven't described is the emotional toll our son’s death has taken on Monica and me, and our daughters. Eric was as kind, honorable, and generous a young man as ever walked this earth. Anyone who actually knew him could verify that. It's true, even if we are his parents. As an undergraduate, he did mission work with abandoned street kids in Guatemala. Later he talked of opening a shelter for runaways, especially LGBT kids. That's the kind of person Eric was. At times we still can't believe he's gone, and miss him more than words can possibly say. We live every day with the rage and the pain, and the injustice. Our family’s story is living proof of just how toxic “the closet” can be for young gays and lesbians, and their loved ones especially in shame-based churches.

A dear friend of ours and a long time member of SNAP told us something quite profound after Eric's death. Janet Patterson was the mother of a young man who took his own life after having been sexually abused by a Catholic priest. Janet says that in situations involving clergy sexual abuse: 'All the wrong people feel guilty'. See Driven From the Flock.

We (victims, survivors, and their loved ones) invariably "beat ourselves up", for what we could or should have done differently to have a different outcome. Generally speaking, the victim’s abusers, enablers, and by-standers seemingly feel ... and certainly show little, if any, remorse. For that matter, apparently only Catholic victims and their families get any form of apology. The best we've ever got from a bishop were ‘prayers’ and second-hand verbal expressions of 'sympathy at our loss'. We hate that word, "loss". We didn't "lose" our son. He wasn't misplaced. His soul was murdered, and his body and spirit simply followed a short while later.

Throughout the 1930’s as the tide of hatred and cowardly indifference toward “the other” was rising in Germany, the "heterodox" Lutheran pastor Dietrich Bonhoeffer taught at an underground seminary for pastors of the Confessing Church at Zingst-Finkenwalde.

It was there in 1935 that he told his students:

'The one who does not cry out for the Jews has no right to sing Gregorian chant'.

Today, we forthrightly submit that:

'The one who does not cry out for the victims of clergy sexual abuse has no right to say the Catholic mass nor sing the Orthodox Divine Liturgy of St. John Chrysostom'.

Perhaps what we've said will be something to take to heart this Lenten season.


John & Monica Kokosinski Iliff

Bloomington, Illinois

I have corresponded with John over a period of some months. On this 2nd anniversary of Eric's death, I ask you to join with me to pray for John and Monica and their family and friends and with Eric's friends to ask God's blessing upon them. May God give them comfort and consolation and the peace that passes understanding to keep their hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

UPDATE: Eric's grave marker.

Dispatch From Our Luiz

concerning the unpleasantness in Recife, Brazil. Luiz is originally from that country, but now resides in the US.

From: Luiz Coelho
Date: March 13, 2009 3:29:11 AM EDT
To: Contributors Episcopal Cafe
Subject: Abortion case in Brazil - update

Hello everybody.

The recent reaction from a Roman Catholic archbishop to a legal abortion case in Brazil has been caused a lot of stir in the blogosphere and the [Episcopal] Café has published some updates on it. I have been following the case closely, both on Brazlian TV and newspapers, and I decided to write this message to clarify some points that, in my opinion, are not being faithfully transmitted by some International news agencies.

First of all, much has been said about abortion laws in Brazil, and most news sources in English have been saying that "Brazil forbids abortion in most cases except for rape." I don't know where that piece of information was obtained, but, actually, Brazil's abortion laws are seen by many scholars as a good balance of progressive thought and ethics. I have double checked this with one lawyer friend, but I can say that the law allows abortion under several possibilities, most notably:

- When the mother was raped and alleges that she cannot emotionally bear that pregnancy;
- When the mother is younger than the age of consent;
- When the fetus has few chances of surviving after birth;
- When the fetus has no brain;
- When the mother's life is in danger due to the pregnancy; and
- Under special permission of a judge (which has created jurisprudence in several specific cases initially not covered by the law)

For the most part, they forbid abortion only when the mother willfully had sexual relations without contraceptives and/or protection, is healthy, and bearing a healthy child. However, a recent ruling by the Supreme Court has decided that Emergency Contraception should not be considered abortion, and "morning after" pills (which actually work up to 5 days after the sexual act) are now distributed freely by the public health system. Recently, the Ministry of Health has started a TV Ad campaign promoting the idea and, due to this fact, most people know to a certain degree that such possibility is available. I can vouch for that, since I had a friend who went through this procedure (which is totally confidential, even for teenagers) some time ago, and successfully prevented a pregnancy. Regular contraceptives and condoms are also distributed freely by the public health system.

It is my general impression that most Brazilians find the current law desirable and humane, and that it basically covers most ethically acceptable possibilities of abortion. I can say that most people I know there are strongly against abortion "for the sake of abortion," especially given all the preventive possibilities offered. Given this scenario, I can tell that the public opinion is strongly against the Archbishop's decision, and the Roman Catholic Church is being heavily criticized for supporting him.

Brazil is a generally progressive society and probably the most liberal one in Latin America (I'd tend to say Argentina could be in this position but they have some issues with racism and anti-semitism that keep me in doubt). I would credit that to the true melting pot that we are (Brazil is in many terms as ethnically diverse as the US). The Brazilian legal system has usually been regarded as progressive-minded too. An interesting phenomenon is that religion (or, I should say, spirituality) still is very important to Brazilians and most people would have their religious practices and rituals even if they disagree with the hierarchy of churches.

Recife is probably the largest city in the Northeastern Region of Brazil, the only part of the country that was not heavily affected by 19th and 20th century immigration, and which has a majority of Afro-Brazilians, most of whom are descendants of many slaves who, sadly, were taken to Brazil (and mostly to the Northeast) to work in large tobacco, cotton and sugarcane plantations. It is also the poorest region of the country, but probably the most culturally
fascinating one. I don't find Northeasterners particularly much more conservative than people in the rest of the country, and the fact that both there were recent issues both with Anglican and Roman Catholic bishops there is probably a sad coincidence. Keep in mind that +Hélder Câmara was the previous archbishop of Olinda and Recife, and this man who is there now is one among many bishops appointed on purpose, to undo most of the work that Liberation Theology bishops had done in the country.

What we see going on in this particular abortion case is, unfortunately, an attempt by the Roman Church to hijack progressive laws by bringing the issue to the media and appealing to the large Catholic crowd that exists there. Sadly for them, most Catholics in Brazil are secular enough not to agree with the curia. They still say their Hail Marys, and go to Mass once in a while, but largely disapprove the Church's views on sexuality and abortion. The same thing happened a couple years ago, when the Supreme Court of Brazil issued a ruling that stated that same-sex partners who could prove their cohabitation status should be recognized as common-law marriages (which, in Brazil, have the same rights as regular marriages after 5 years of cohabitation). This measure de facto extended marriage rights to same-sex couples until the Congress decides to approve one of the many amendments to the Civil Code that were proposed. Bishops protested and tried to conclaim Catholics to a "holy war".

For the most part, they were ignored.


Luiz Coelho

Please Pray For Hillbilly, Mrs H., and Sprout

From Arkansas Hillbilly:

Eternal Optimist, But...

I'm also the eternal worry wart. Mrs. H. finally got ahold of the nurse at the clinic. Turns out that the quad screening they did says she has too much pregnancy hormone, meaning:

a) She's a week further along than they thought, which is why they want to do the ultrasound early...

b) Sprout has Down's Syndrome...or

c) Sprout is actually Sprouts (twins)...

I'm more worried about option (b) right now, and of course, Mrs. H. is beside herself with worry. The clinic couldn't get her in for an ultrasound today, and they don't do them on Fridays, so Monday was the soonest they could get her in. So we get to go through the entire weekend worried sick. So if y'all could keep us in your prayers, I'd be much obliged.

Please leave your comments for the family at the link above. Thanks.