BARBIE AND GI JOE

Wicked Paul the BB sent me the following joke from his equally wicked friend Kathy saying:

Clearly not blog material, but it is naughty and might make you chuckle.

The joke is naughty, and I responded with more than a chuckle on first reading, and second, and third. I've been pondering the joke for several days, because I was not quite so clear as Paul that the joke was not blog material. Today, following my discovery of the video for the Nissan commercial, I decided that my blog would not be child-friendly just for this one day - just this one day, you understand!

Here is the naughty joke:

A little girl clambered aboard Santa's lap and mumbled charmingly around a finger: "I wanna...I wanna a Barbie Doll and a...um...a GI Joe."

Santa was startled. "Well, honey, you know, GI Joe's are kind of for boys more than girls. Barbie comes with a Ken, not a GI Joe."

"No," she said firmly, pulling out her finger. "She only fakes it with Ken. She comes with GI Joe."

Paul's further commentary:

Kathy is very naughty this time and I told her I do not wish to think about how a little girl would know so much so soon.

Disclosure: My son works for Nissan.

UPDATE: Grandpère was rather shocked that I posted the joke. He said, "It's like something you'd find in Playboy." He could be right. I wouldn't know, because I never read Playboy.

"MY FAVORITE CHRISTMAS COOKIE RECIPE"

This recipe calls for Absolut vodka but if you don't have that, any vodka will do (I prefer Skyy). If the cookies come out as I expect them to, please mail me some. Trust me, read this all the way through....

Ingredients:

1 bottle Absolut vodka
1 cup water
1 tsp. baking soda
1 cup sugar
1 tsp. salt
1 cup brown sugar
lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups dried fruit
4 cups flour

Sample the Absolut to check quality. Take a large bowl. Check the Absolut again to be sure it is of the highest quality. Pour 1 level cup and drink. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat 1 cup butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar; beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Absolut is still OK. Try another cup, just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy, break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in 1 cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor... mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Absolut to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt or something. Who giveshz a sheet. Check the Absolut.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add 1 table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turners. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Absolut and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

CHERRY MISTMAS!!!!!!

Thanks to the notorious woman known around the internets as Suzanne. It doesn't hurt to start gathering your Christmas recipes early.

IF I'M WRONG, I'M WRIGHT

From the Church of Ireland Gazette:

Speaking to the Gazette editor in an interview while visiting Ireland, Bishop Tom Wright, former Bishop of Durham and now a Research Professor at the University of St Andrews, has said that the Church of England should not proceed to the consecration of women as Bishops if the move were to create a large division.

He said: "my own position is quite clear on this, that I have supported women Bishops in print and in person. I’ve spoken in Synod in favour of going that route, but I don’t think it’s something that ought to be done at the cost of a major division in the Church."

Bishop Wright warned that if the Church of England were not able to resolve the matter "a ‘quick fix’ resolution" would be "a recipe for long-term disaster".

If Bishop Wright's "position is quite clear on" women bishops, why would he pull the rug from under them when controversy develops? Abandoning women when the going gets tough is hardly supportive. What good are empty words? And 30 16 years after the first women priests is a quick fix?

Asked to comment on what would happen if the Church of England rejected the Covenant proposal, Bishop Wright said: "That is always a possibility, and if that happens, then I suppose the thing would be dead in the water. but that’s a notional possibility which I don’t actually see as realistic."

That "the thing would be dead in the water" is my fondest hope. We can but try to shed light on the possible negative consequences for the Anglican Communion if the Daft Covenant is adopted. If Bishop Wright thinks "the kind of unstructured mess that we’ve had" is bad, then, very likely, he faces a far grander mess if his wish for a covenant comes to pass.

Bishop Wright is often good copy.

MY HOME LAST NIGHT

Pictured above is my room at the Sully Mansion in the Garden District in New Orleans. The gracious hosts at the Sully Mansion made me welcome and more than comfortable during my stay.

I attended a lovely reception and later a wonderful dinner, both in honor of Susan Russell and her wife, Louise Brooks. Both events were held in homes in the Garden District, one of my favorite places in New Orleans. At the reception, I spent a good bit of time talking to our friend Ormonde and his lovely wife, Kay.

I'd adore to live in the Garden District, but I'd have to give up my husband, my home, and living near two of my children. A house in the Garden District is, to me, a pearl of great price, but, in the end, I'm not willing to pay the price. But I can dream. If my dream came true, I'd wish to have a house like the one pictured below.



I'd met Susan at GC09, but I met Louise for the first time last night. Usually, I'm very bad at remembering names, but I'll have no trouble with Louise's name, because she shares the name of the famous silent film actor. Louise joked that Louise, the actor, was her grandmother.

I told Susan that she was a rock star in the Episcopal Church, and she demurred. I don't know what Susan's voice is like, but she rocks, and that makes her a rock star to me. Anyway, I had a fine time in such sparkling and stimulating company. Once again, our hosts in both houses were welcoming and gracious.

Apropos of quite a thin connection, below is a YouTube video tribute to Louise Brooks, with Josephine Baker singing "Bye-bye Blackbird".




Tomorrow evening, I'll be back in New Orleans to hear Susan speak.

COMMON GROUND AND SOCIAL JUSTICE

AN EVENING WITH THE REV. CANON SUSAN RUSSELL

Thursday, November 4, 2010
7:15 p.m.

Trinity Episcopal Church
Bishop Polk Hall

ANGLICANS AROUND THE WORLD OPPOSE COVENANT

IT'S HERE!


From No Anglican Covenant:

Anglican churches are being asked to adopt a so-called Anglican Covenant that seeks to bind them more tightly to one another and to codify procedures by which future disputes within the Anglican Communion will be resolved.

We believe that this covenant is ill-conceived. In response to the reputed “crisis” in the Communion, drafters of the covenant have favoured coercion over the hard work of reconciliation. The covenant seeks to narrow the range of acceptable belief within Anglicanism and to prevent further development of Anglican thought. Rather than bringing peace to the Communion, we predict that the covenant text itself could become the cause of future bickering and that its centralized dispute-resolution mechanisms could beget interminable quarrels and resentments.

I'm June Butler, and I approve this message. No good will come of the covenant.

General Synod of the Church of England will meet on 23 and 24 November 2010 and debate and vote on the Anglican Covenant.

This site is the work of the No Anglican Covenant Coalition. The Coalition comprises dedicated Christians, many of them bloggers, from around the worldwide Anglican Communion who believe that the proposed Anglican Covenant our churches are being asked to endorse is, at best, redundant, but, more likely, will do irreparable harm to our churches and to our Communion.

In particular, the members of the Coalition believe that the covenant is likely to change forever the fundamental nature of not only the Anglican Communion, but also of Anglicanism itself. Out of a fellowship of mutually supportive yet diverse regional and national churches tracing their historical and liturgical traditions to the Church of England, there threatens to emerge a monolithic, worldwide church unresponsive to local needs, narrow in its theological outlook, and governed exclusively by bishops most of us will never see.

For me to have been asked to be part of a group which includes such worthies is quite an honor. I hasten to add that my contribution to the hard work of putting the web site together was quite small. Others worked long and heroically, and I believe the result is splendid.

November 3rd is an ideal day to launch a new international organization resisting the proposed Anglican Covenant because it is the day Anglicans commemorate the sixteenth-century theologian Richard Hooker. Hooker argued that the Church should use the full range of reasoning faculties in matters of faith and should develop in light of changing circumstances. New ideas and differences of opinion, therefore, have a proper place within the Church. It is this openness and tolerance that we, the No Anglican Covenant Coalition, wish to defend today against an Anglican Covenant that would suppress differences of opinion.

Click on the link and explore the No Anglican Covenant web site. You'll find all you've ever wanted to know about the covenant and more.



Visit us on Facebook and Twitter.

The statue of Richard Hooker stands before Exeter Cathedral in England. Photo courtesy of Ann Fontaine.

BLESSINGS AND CONGRATULATIONS, BISHOP GENE

On this date 7 years ago, Bishop Gene Robinson became a bishop in the Episcopal Church. Susan Russell was there. Read her lovely account of the great day at An Inch At a Time.

Susan says in her post:

I'm writing this between flights (thanks for the free wifi, McCarren Airport!) ... and I'm honored and excited to have been invited to come to New Orleans to preach a bit, speak a bit, meet-and-greet a bit ... to talk about "Common Ground & Social Justice" in the Diocese of Louisiana.

I will be in that number when Susan speaks on Thursday evening.

COMMON GROUND AND SOCIAL JUSTICE

AN EVENING WITH THE REV. CANON SUSAN RUSSELL

Thursday, November 4, 2010
7:15 p.m.

Trinity Episcopal Church
Bishop Polk Hall

ON Wednesday evening, Susan+ will preach at Holy Eucharist at the Chapel of the Holy Spirit on Broadway, near Tulane/Loyola Universities. Outreach to LGBTQ youth is the focus of that evening.

If you live in or near New Orleans, I urge you to attend one or both of the events if at all possible.

"NO LONGER CAN"

From the The New York Times:

The spokesman for the arch-conservative leader of Belgium's Roman Catholic Church has resigned after his boss defended priests accused of pedophilia and criticized AIDS patients.

Spokesman Juergen Mettepenningen told reporters that he "no longer can" work for Archbishop Andre Leonard.

Still, one wonders what took Mettepenningen so long, but better late than never. I expect that Archbishop Leonard's words were the last straw for a good many Roman Catholics in Belgium and around the world.

Thanks to Lapin for the link

VOTE AND VOTE SMART

KIRSTIN NEEDS TRAVEL COMPANIONS

Kirstin is undergoing chemotherapy for melanoma, and she needs people to travel with her and stay with her when she has her treatments.

If you’ve gotten this far: We need more people to come to Riverside with me. I hate to be this blunt—I loathe the position it puts me in, even to ask—but my life depends on it. They won’t admit me if I don’t have a companion. My roommate Andee has exhausted her vacation time. I need someone to fly down and back with me, and be in the hospital with me while I’m there and awake. I need emotional and physical support. And even if I didn’t, they wouldn’t treat me if I went on my own. You are helping save a life, if you go.

Kaiser pays for lodging and travel expenses from Northern California. (If you’re not in Northern California, but would otherwise be available, don’t rule yourself out. A friend who has lots of frequent flier miles has put them at my disposal.)

Read the rest of Kirstin's post at Barefoot and Laughing. If you can help, her email address is on her profile page.

A CROWD OF WITNESSES

Eastern Orthodox icon of All Saints. Christ is enthroned in heaven surrounded by the ranks of angels and saints. At the bottom is Paradise with the bosom of Abraham (left), and the Good Thief (right).

2 Esdras 2:42-47 (NRSV)

I, Ezra, saw on Mount Zion a crowd too large to count, all singing hymns of praise to the Lord. In the middle stood a very tall young man, taller than all the rest, who was setting a crown on the head of each one of them; he stood out above them all. I was enthralled at the sight, and asked the angel, "Sir, who are these?" He replied, "They are those who have laid aside their mortal dress and put on the immortal, those who acknowledged the name of God. Now they are being given crowns and palms." And I asked again, "Who is the young man setting crowns on their heads and giving them palms?", and the angel replied, "He is the Son of God, whom they acknowledged in this mortal life." I began to praise those who had stood so valiantly for the Lord's name. Then the angel said to me, "Go and tell my people all the great and wonderful acts of the Lord God that you have seen."

Hebrews 12:1-2 (NRSV)

As for us, we have this large crowd of witnesses around us. Let us rid ourselves, then, of everything that gets in the way, and the sin which holds on to us so tightly, and let us run with determination the race that lies before us. Let us keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from beginning to end. He did not give up because of the cross! On the contrary, because of the joy that was waiting for him, he thought nothing of the disgrace of dying on the cross, and is now seated at the right hand of God's throne.

The saints from the ages stand with us in our witness. Thanks be to God.

Image from Wikipedia